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The "Only In Miami" Thread

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  • #1


    Lingerie-clad woman rides white horse through Miami nightclub

    A Miami nightclub has lost its business license over a video that shows a woman riding a white horse through the venue.

    Authorities say they are investigating Mokai Lounge for animal cruelty, public health and public safety issues, the Miami Herald reported.

    The video shows the horse stride through the venue before it suddenly falls, then bucks and throws its rider — a woman dressed in lingerie — to the ground.

    City Manager Jimmy L. Morales revoked the nightclub’s license Friday.

    “I was disgusted and offended that any legitimate businessperson would think this was an appropriate action to take,” Morales said.

    “This activity was not permitted, and as soon as we became aware, I immediately instructed staff to act swiftly in remedying this situation.”

    Morales said the club’s actions constitute animal cruelty.

    Miami Beach Mayor Dan Gelber called animal cruelty “an abhorrent and vile act.”

    He said he supported the city manager’s swift response to the incident.

    “What kind of idiot would do something like this to an animal and endanger people’s lives at that club?” Gelber said at a news conference late Friday. “It’s not tolerable, not right, not humane.”

    The white horse was located in Miami-Dade County Friday and deemed safe and healthy, police said.
    http://www.nydailynews.com/news/nati...icle-1.3867072
    "I guess I just hate the fact there is public property at all." - Mr. Raceboy.

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    • #2
      Just heard the poor horse now has a rash on its back.
      "Democracy is a form of worship. It is the worship of jackals by jackasses." H.L. Mencken

      Comment


      • #3
        Originally posted by Mr. Raceboy View Post
        Just heard the poor horse now has a rash on its back.
        So, Carl Hiassen is just an unimaginative journalist then.
        They speak in bulletpointese leftist nutjob drivel. It doesn't matter. Nothing is as great a motivator as the chance to truly be free.
        -Mr. Raceboy

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        • #4
          On the drive into work this morning, a rooster hustles around a corner and flies by my car.

          Five seconds later, a City worker rounds the corner in hot pursuit carrying a large net.

          skooly (can't make this stuff up)
          "I guess I just hate the fact there is public property at all." - Mr. Raceboy.

          Comment


          • #5
            We should all chip in and get you a dash cam.

            Pete (wants video)

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            • #6
              http://www.miamiherald.com/news/loca...204704804.html


              Hit-and-run suspect who drove through sledgehammer attack ticketed 29 times in 10 years

              The hit-and-run suspect who rolled away from Sunday’s four-car midtown Miami crash and through a sledgehammer attack, dragging a fender, appeared to “be high on narcotics,” according to his arrest report.

              Aventura 25-year-old Maxwell Lagutenko definitely owns a past pockmarked by drug arrests, bad driving and other questionable decisions.
              http://www.miamiherald.com/news/loca...207800589.html

              Hit-and-run suspect who drove through sledgehammer attack faces more criminal charges

              Additional criminal charges have been filed against an Aventura man in the Biscayne Boulevard crash involving several vehicles and a bystander taking a sledgehammer to his Infiniti.

              The March 11 sledgehammer attack, which shattered the rear window of Maxwell Lagutenko's car, occurred as the 25-year-old tried to drive his mangled Infiniti west on Northeast 36th Street after hitting several cars. That has led to three felony counts of leaving the scene of an accident and misdemeanor reckless driving to go with the fleeing and eluding law enforcement charge on which he was originally booked.

              Lagutenko entered "not guilty" pleas to all charges. He posted $5,000 bond on March 16.

              Our winner:


              Pete (follows up)

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              • #7


                Naked man climbs excavator and masturbates during rush hour

                A schizophrenic man gave passers-by a not-so-pleasant surprise as he climbed a 30-foot-tall construction excavator on Miami’s Palmetto Expressway. The man reportedly escaped his ambulance, removed his clothes and masturbated for all to see during rush hour. He eventually climbed down and was handcuffed and taken to the Jackson Memorial Crisis Unit for evaluation.
                "I guess I just hate the fact there is public property at all." - Mr. Raceboy.

                Comment


                • #8
                  OK, now that I've never seen before.

                  Pete (laughs)

                  Comment


                  • #9


                    Every time you turn around, someone new in South Florida is hanging off a moving vehicle – and getting caught on video.

                    Why this seems to happen so much in South Florida remains a mystery. We haven’t seen it in Portland or Omaha or Charlotte. Is it the heat? The humidity? We can’t even rely on our usual excuse (“because Miami”) because the latest incident happened in Broward.

                    Here’s what went down on the roads of Broward, captured by Chris Martin and posted on his Facebook page:

                    Yes. That man is hanging on to the back of a Broward County Transit bus driving along Route 60. According to the Sun Sentinel, the route runs between Broward Central Terminal and 441 and Northwest 15th Street.

                    Why does someone jump on the back of a bus? Because it is there.

                    This gentleman joins two other recent car-hood joyriders (although we can’t imagine there’s much joy in riding on a speeding vehicle in this heat).

                    Back in June there was this guy, clinging to the hood of a car in the express lanes of I-95:

                    We had some theories about why he was doing this. But it turns out the event was a domestic spat gone awry. Way awry. Driver Patresha Isidore, who said she wanted to take the car to pick up her daughter when her boyfriend didn’t want her to, was charged with culpable negligence and exposure to harm for driving off with ex Junior Francis on the hood.

                    Then there was this guy, also clinging to a car hood:
                    See link for vids:

                    https://www.miami.com/funny-stories/...hicles-194293/
                    "I guess I just hate the fact there is public property at all." - Mr. Raceboy.

                    Comment


                    • #10
                      This thread cracks me up every time.

                      Pete (has in the past hung on to the backs of trucks while riding his bike)

                      Comment


                      • #11
                        Video of man exposing his genitals in the middle of Miami on Flagler and 42nd.

                        https://www.facebook.com/ssom305/vid...5975232112559/
                        "I guess I just hate the fact there is public property at all." - Mr. Raceboy.

                        Comment


                        • #12
                          My current favorite thread!

                          Pete (says "keep them coming")

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                          • #13


                            Photo shows nearly naked bicyclist weaving through I-95 traffic in Miami

                            Drivers stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic on I-95 in Miami on Thursday evening had some speedy — and skimpy — company.

                            While traffic crawled along just north of downtown, a man wearing nothing more than a headband, pink socks, sneakers and thin underwear was seen weaving in and out of traffic on a pricey-looking road bike.

                            One of the drivers, Jesse Schwartz of Fort Lauderdale, was heading home from his job in Miami and captured a photo of the unusual commuter around 6:30 p.m.

                            “He was beating traffic,” Schwartz said. “Apparently, this guys does this often.”

                            Lt. Alejandro Camacho of the Florida Highway Patrol’s Miami division confirmed receiving reports of the bicyclist on the interstate somewhere near NW 151st Street.

                            Troopers and Miami police officers searched without success for the cyclist. “It appears he exited off the highway and we were unable to locate him,” Camacho said.

                            He added that riding a bicycle on I-95 is against the law. “Everything has to be motorized on a limited-access roadway, which I-95 is.”
                            http://www.sun-sentinel.com/local/mi...24-story.html#
                            "I guess I just hate the fact there is public property at all." - Mr. Raceboy.

                            Comment


                            • #14
                              Originally posted by Plezercruz View Post
                              My current favorite thread!

                              Pete (says "keep them coming")
                              Pete (hates repeating himself)

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                              • #15
                                That's a fucking $6000 bicycle!
                                "Democracy is a form of worship. It is the worship of jackals by jackasses." H.L. Mencken

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